any way the wind blows, doesn’t really matter…

Okay, I have no reason to write this post except that hubby showed me this hilarious video (hats off to the the funny chiptalk forum guys for the video and the image). This has been going around lately, so you’ve probably seen it, but just in case you haven’t it’s a must-watch. I have a mixture of pity and admiration for the drunk-ass man in the video. Even wasted, this fellow knows his Queen.

Hubby and I have made a solemn pinky-promise that should either one of us get arrested we will perform this number in the patrol car for the enjoyment of the arresting officers and whoever else might ever see the video. So I did a dry-run last night while hubby kept the lyrics page open to check me. I did pretty darn good if I say so myself–about a B+ without studying. (There were a couple spots that I made a substitution of a sound-alike word vs the real ones, of course, and then I somehow left out the whole so you think you can stop me and spit in my eye… verse right near the end. Sheesh!) But overall, I think that with just a little work I’ll be primed for that patrol-car ride for when I begin my life of crime.

It never hurts to be prepared…

and there was light and it was freakin’ awesome…

Okay, so here’s the story. We’ve been in this house ten months and for all ten months the streetlight in our front yard has been out. Although the obvious question is “why did you ignore the issue for ten months,” that is not the question I’m answering in this post.

So, here we go…

Upon my request, Hubby emailed the home owners association to ask about getting the light turned on (in the spirit of full disclosure, this first step happened about six months ago). The HOA told him that we needed to talk to the city. So, I told him I’d take care of it (that was about six months and one day ago).

Well, apparently there is a statute of limitations on procrastination, because last Wednesday morning I finally called the street department of our fine city and told them about our light. The city worker informed me that a local electric company, Oncor, takes care of all the streetlights. Sooooo, I called Oncor and worked my way through their hellish nifty little phone menu and, when I was at last able to speak to a human, I explained my problem. The woman on the phone replied, “I’m sorry, but there is not a streetlight at that address.”

I happened to be standing at my window, looking at the light in my yard, and I started to laugh. My husband walked past, and so I told him what the Oncor woman had just said, he replied, “She’s right. At this point it’s just a pole with a decorative top.” I shared my husband’s clever comment with the not-very oh-so polite Oncor service representative. She was not amused.

When, despite her many assurances that there was no light, I continued to believe my eyes rather than her words, she finally heaved a sigh and told me that she would have someone call me back. Now I’ll admit, when she hung up I thought, “suuuure you will…” But amazingly less than half an hour later someone else did call back.

This new person seemed less cranky but equally convinced that there was no light in my yard. The woman asked me go out and see if there were any numbers on the pole. So I went outside and sure enough, there were big orange numbers which I read off to her…and then I also read off the numbers on the Oncor box sitting right next to the streetlight. She told me that the streetlight was not one of their lights…but that the box was one of their streetlights. Hmmmm…. In fact, she went on to tell me that there were no streetlights at all on my side of the street (there are many, btw). However, she finally agreed to send a technician to take a look at things.

So I finally got off the phone and went to work and figured that in another ten months I’d try again. But the next morning when I got out of bed too-freakin-early, poured myself a cup of coffee and then went outside in the still-dark morning to get the paper, what do I see outside? Yes!! A light!

I’m sure there’s a moral here somewhere, but I’ll be damned if I can figure it out. Ask–No Insist and ye shall receive? I don’t know.

What I do know is that the video below is what I should have put with my last post where I mentioned 70’s bowchickawowow porno music. I’m pretty sure that’s the soundtrack playing in this guy’s head while he’s doing whatever in the hell he thinks he’s doing.

most neglected blog award…

Imagine my surprise when I got an email that said I had a new comment on this blog which I have shamelessly neglected. And, more surprising was the fact that not only did someone actually come to this site, but she decided that it deserved an award. And no, smarty pants, it’s not the Most in Need of Attention Blog Award (is there one? if not, there should be). No it is the Most Lovely Blog Award. And the twee image for the award has roses nestled in a teacup with a bow and…wait one minute

That photo above is one I found when I searched the name of the award to snag an image to put on this post. But when I went to the site of the fabulous blogger, Sheila Hurst, who nominated me, the image below is the one she has on her site for the award:

Totally different concept of Most Lovely Blog Award. This blog award needs to have some 70’s porn bowchickawowow music playing in the background. Even the roses in this image seem to be straining and heaving, struggling not to explode out of the cup. Am I right? Much better than the other image, IMO. Ha!

I think the rules to this award are that I nominate 15 other blogs to win it…which seems like a lot to me, because I’m a slacker. But I will share a few (that I admit to) that I read semi-regularily. And then I think I’m also supposed to tell each of them that I nominated them and I’ll probably tell a couple of them, but probably not all. Slacker, remember?

  • Sonje Jones: a ultra cool writer who has the first of her series of four books coming out soon!
  • Yuri Zalkow: if you haven’t checked out his blog, you should. He makes these great little instructional videos about writing. They’re wonderful.
  • Maggie Stiefvater: she hits the sweet spot between blogging about her bestselling YA novels (book tours, audio tapes awards) and just random posts on writing and/or stuff going on in her life.
  • thekitchensgarden: Careful, this blog is addictive. Just a woman, her small sustainable farm and some great photos. Every morning I read it while I drink my coffee and spend a couple minutes imagining what it would be like to walk in her shoes (farm boots) for a few days.
  • Justine Musk: Okay, I’ll be honest, I don’t remember to read this one as much as I should–I say that because when I do I think, “now why do I not read this more often?” I’ve moved it to my bookmark bar to remind myself.
  • Kelly Hitchcock: He’s the owner of the gym where I work out. He’s big into sarcasm, so about half of his posts are serious posts about behavior/fitness and the other half are pseudo-serious rants about things he finds ridiculous.
And just in case you’re still reading and have three more minutes to spare, here’s one of Yuri Zalkow’s videos. Enjoy!